from fuzzy teeth to Grover Cleveland

I'm so tired of feeling cold.  The Wisconsin winter has settled into my bones.  My fingers have been ice-cold for, what?, 5 months now?  By the end of the night, I put my hands under my butt while laying in bed to finally warm them up.

I met with one of my favorite people today.  Sadly, she was recently diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease.  She is an amazing and inspirational woman, even though she feels pretty low these days.  I am so sad for her, and I was relieved to see her today and offer my support in person.

I also hauled all three boys to the dentist this afternoon.  3 boys and *only* 1 cavity between all of them, though many references to "fuzzy" teeth.  Ewww.  Gross.

Two has recently become an aficionado of the presidents ("of the United States" he always adds).  He loves to rattle off the order of the presidents.  Second president?  James Adams.  17th president?  Andrew Johnson.  Grover Cleveland?  22 and 24th president.  This helps balance out his WWE obsession.

Bob and I came up with an allowance schedule over the weekend.  Briefly, we have expectations of the children (pick up their room, display good brother behavior, do homework without fuss, etc), and if they meet those expectations, we will give them their allowance, which we will save part of.  They will also have the opportunity to earn more money through extra jobs as they come up.  I like this plan.  I hope it works.

I am almost done with my laundry duties of the day.  I had 5 baskets to fold and put away.  I need to head upstairs now and wrap it up.  I am pretty tired of laundry.  Does anyone enjoy this chore?

March 21

yesterday I
0.  started off the day with a little yoga booty ballet
1.  got the kiddos off to their schools
2.  went grocery shopping
3.  returned a bunch of stuff at Target
4.  visited my grandma (my poor, sweet, old grandma - my heart breaks for her - I miss who she was so much)
5.  ran to the doctors to drop off a "sample" because I suspect I have a UTI
6.  donated blood
7.  fit in a run to Trader Joes
8.  realized it was after noon and I should eat something - "mid-east tray" at Trader Joes, in homage of my loves in Palestine
9.  picked up the kiddos, early release, though 20 minutes later than usual thanks to the 4 day "sick in"
10. made the impulsive decision to allow One and Two to play at the school playground alone, while I
11. took Three to his annual well child check
12. surprised Three with the news that he would be getting two shots, and was proud at how brave he took it
13 returned home to collect all the children and wrap my head around a dinner plan
14. made the dinner (which was declared "gross!" by Two and flat-out denied by Three - ah, success!)
15. soothed a sad Two's hurt feelings after a rowdy neighborhood game of Kick The Can went south
16. received the news that indeed I have a bladder infection which may have traveled to my kidneys too
17. saw my neighbors who brought home our dog who was found running around the neighborhood, several blocks away (and no, we didn't know he was missing)
18. welcomed home a husband who was angry and not very pleasant to be around
19. ushered the kids upstairs to bedtime for books and snuggles, and
20. fell asleep next to One, and
21. found Two in my bed, snuggled up to the prodigal doggie.

Today I
1.  walked 2.5 miles with Leslie Sansone
2.  will work 9 hours, and
3.  am happy to be spending the day inside, given the lousy weather we're going to have.

What's on your list?

March 20

Today my baby turned 5.

We had a fun party at Pump It Up (or, Pump It Out, as I overheard Bob said - hee hee)

I'm happy to (mostly) still be in charge of the invite list, so I can make sure my people are there too.

I have such nice people.

I remembered at 7 pm that I still needed to bake brownies for the birthday boys' class tomorrow.

I was thankful to remember it at 7pm and not 10 pm,

or, even worse, 7 am tomorrow.

Friday night's shindig with some lady friends was very fun.

We developed a plan that sounded better after a few beers and in the cloak of darkness.

It includes going to a Hookah Bar and not wearing underwear - 

not necessarily at the same time.

We missed the International Dinner at school yesterday because Mr Birthday Boy was running a fever.

Instead, we stayed at home, had a fire in the firepit, raked the yard, talked with neighbors.

Sat on the front porch - which hasn't been done for 5 months.

I shuttled 4 bikes over to the nearby bike shop for tune ups.

Three got brand new training wheels on his beat-up old bike.

Bob changed the storm door to the screen in the front.

Spring is here.

Brownies are done.

I am tired.

Off 

to

relax.

checking in

Hi.

So, what's new with you?





OK, enough of that.

I'm in a good mood.  It's Friday and sunny.  My kids are happy and at home.  They have a fun night planned with their father and another father and his 3 boys down the street.  All men, pizzas and movies - ending in a sleepover (there, not here, thankyouverymuch).  I have a fun night planned, celebrating one of my sweet friend's birthdays at a fun hangout nearby.

Tomorrow is the International Dinner our PTO puts on.  It's a fun night, and newly situated on the weekend, which I like.  We have a fairly diverse school (for Wisconsin), and I love how we honor our diversity like this.  The Hmong kids are going to do a dance, and the West African dance troop is also performing.  The principal is doing a cooking demonstration.  We are to bring something ethnic.  I'm planning on making my grandma's oatmeal/chocolate chip cookies.  Not very ethnic, but a favorite old recipe from our family.

Sunday is Three's fifth birthday.  I can't believe my little baby is turning five.  We are celebrating at Pump It Up, a jumpy, inflatable gym place.  It's a splurge, but I gotta tell you - my house is a wreck and I'm so relieved to not have to entertain a dozen or so 4 and 5 year olds.  Especially since it looks like it will be rainy that day.  Hey - I'm a workin' mom.  I get it now.  I'll gladly pay to have the mess and chaos somewhere else.

A few weeks ago I started getting up early in the morning to work out before work.  I haven't done that all week this week (choosing sleep over exercise), but I have ridden my bike to work three days.  Now, it doesn't take me long to ride (7 minutes is all) but it's something, and I try to ride at a brisk pace so at least it's a cardio blast.  Regardless, now that I've adjusted to the time change, I hope to return next week to early morning yoga booty ballet.

One complained to me after school today that "there's nothing to eat around here!"  While I admit our snacks are a bit low, I offered to make him something.  "What do you want?" I gamely asked.  "GOLDFISH crackers!" he responded.  So, I thought for a moment and said, "want to walk over to Copps to buy some?  You can take some cash out of my wallet."  So, away he and Two went, to cross a fairly busy street, to then cross a very busy street (with a light and walk button), to then eventually walk through a parking lot to reach the store.  All in all, a 5 minute walk, so not far but potentially treacherous.  I kind of held my breath while they were gone, and they came back with goldfish crackers,  a couple of funny stories, and an extra spring in their step by having a taste of independence.  I'm so glad I can trust them and so glad to give them those opportunities.

Off to be a bit productive.  Sweep the mud, vacuum the dirt clumps - tis the spring season!

Happy weekend, y'all!

mulling and ruminating

So, life has been kind of busy lately.  Shall we catch up?

I missed two days of work last week.  One day because my darlin' number one son was home sick.  And then a later day because I was sick.  Ugh.  It was short-lived but ugly, if you know what I mean.  A couple of emergency runs to the bathroom in the middle of the night.  I hate that.  I can tell you this - I'm not touching those almond crackers I was eating earlier that day for a looooong time.  Yuck.

I recovered enough to join 100,000 or so of my closest protesting friends at the capitol for a little farmer-aided protesting last Saturday.  It was awesome.  Actually, it's sad how the proposed budget changes are going to affect the farmers too (did you know 1 in 7 farmers in WI have badgercare, our state's version of Medicaid?).  I mean, making cuts that hurt farmers of all people.  Those farmin' folks should get a pass for just about anything and not be so poor they have to have badgercare.  That is now going to get cut.  But I digress...  I'm not going to make this post all political.

I came home to recover from the tractor protest and planned to return, sans children, for the welcome home rally of the Wisconsin 14, but I felt too darn yucky still to venture out again.  And, although it was a beautiful sunny day, it was only 38 degrees out and windy.  We are hardcore here in Wisconsin, but it wasn't a comfortable day to be outside for hours - at least, not for me.  So, I watched it online here at home, bundled in a blanket.  Jesse Jackson offered a prayer at the beginning for the folks in Japan, which was quite moving.  I'm not a big prayer person (if you haven't picked up on that yet) - not that I have any problem with it, I just don't really know how to do it - but this one was very touching.  Of course, it didn't hurt that Jesse Jackson delivered it.  That guy could read from Green Eggs and Ham and it would be moving.  Oh wait, he did that, didn't he?  :)

Anyway, later that evening, we went to a friends' annual St. Patrick's day party.  I look forward to this party every year, so this year, a few weeks ago, I arranged for one of our little neighborhood teenagers to come over and sit the boys so we could go and whoop it up, kid-free.  Bob talked with another friend earlier in the week, and this friend said they were bringing their kids, so we should bring ours.  Against my wishes, Bob cancelled the sitter.  Turns out that it was probably an ok thing, as I was still feeling pretty punky and there was no whooping-up for me going on.  We came in, hung out for a couple of hours, and left.  Kids grumbled a bit about going (and I silently grumbled with them) but we saved a bunch on a babysitter, so I suppose that's something.  I had a fun time reconnecting with old work friends, which is always enjoyable.

The next day, I bought a new bike at the annual spring bike-o-rama sale.  (insert picture of pretty, green bike here - oh, I have yet to take a picture of it.  Well, here's a link - picture it in a lovely olive green.)  I absolutely lurve my new bike, and I've ridden it to work 2 days this week.  Love, love, LOVE the springtime weather we're having!

Something else happened that I'm not sure I want to blog about (ha!  how's that for being stinky!), so I'll just move right along...  Oh, fine.  I'll spill the beans.  I'm pregnant.  NO!  Kidding!  I'm not sure what came over me - I'm NOT pregnant, at least, I better not be.  I'm waaaaaaay too old to that again.

Anyway, back to it... well, briefly (ha! is anything I say brief?), I had a job interview with the department in which I previously worked.  Turns out it was for the exact position that I have the bulk of my professional experience doing.   When I left working at the county (because I was a new mama who couldn't bear the thought of putting my new babe in daycare while I worked taking other people's children away), I left in good standing with a good, I believe, reputation of being a hard, smart, compassionate worker.  At least, I think that's how they viewed me.  I mentioned to the main HR person that I was thinking about returning to work at the county.  She was excited and said she looked forward to my application.  OK, so I applied, scored high on the test-part, and was offered an interview.  I interviewed with a panel (one of whom, currently a manager, I trained when she was a new worker in my unit) and thought I did a good job.  I was, I hoped, the right balance of knowledgable yet funny, serious yet engaging.  You know, I worked the table a bit, and left planning on receiving a job offer.  Guess what?  They turned me down.  They offered a job to an intern.  An intern.  I am still in a bit of shock about it.  Turns out I had decided to turn them down (I didn't want a full time job there, since I knew it was more like a 45 or 50 hour/week job and that won't work well with my family), but they turned me down.  For an intern.

Talk about a blow to one's ego.

Since then, I have processed this with a bunch of people, and my collection of experts have concluded that the job was probably offered to the (gulp) intern because I made it quite clear in the interview that I was really interested in part-time and quite a bit less interested in full-time.  Since this is a full-time job, we decided they offered it to the person desiring full-time work.  The HR person was sweetly apologetic in her message on my voicemail at home, and she referenced this part-time/full-time dilemma and said my name would be on their list for the next 6 months, should another position become available.

My master plan was to receive a job offer from the county and somehow parlay that into a permanent job at my current employer.  I hadn't yet connected the dots yet on that plan, but I thought that if I had an offer, my current employer would scramble to keep me, since, you know, I'm so desirable and all that.  Since that plan went into the dumper the moment I didn't have my bird in the hand, I decided to let go of this pressure to get a permanent position and just be thankful I have a job that I like, that is the right amount of hours, that is within biking distance of my house, etc etc.

So, get this.  There kind of is a happy ending here.  In step one of my above-stated-not-well-thought-out plan, I had previously told my current boss (whom, coincidently, I met at the county when we worked together and whom I also trained when she was a new worker there), A, that I had this interview coming up.  Last night when I was leaving work, A asked me how the interview went and if I was leaving to work at the county.  I am an awful liar, especially on the spot, so I went with the truth.  I said, "nah, get this, they didn't offer it to me, they offered it to an INTERN of all people, I'm trying to be gracious about it but I'm really struggling, but turns out it's reminded me how thankful I am to have this opportunity here and how much I like working here" and bla bla bla.  A told me that, shortly after she returned from a brief out-of-state living arrangement after working at the county, she reapplied there and she didn't even score well enough to get an interview.  I said, "well, look at you now!" and meant it - she's a successful and respected manager at one of the largest, if not the largest, mental health clinic in the area.  Anyway, we segued into talking about the possibility of her being able to post a permanent opening for the job I'm doing now ("and I hope you apply!" she said - "that's the plan!" I responded) and I left feeling a bit better about myself.  If she didn't even get an interview, then I'm in good company being rejected.  I have a lot of respect for A.  And, sounds like she likes me too.  She added some sweet compliments she's heard about me, which helped boost my bruised ego.

So, this brings me to my point.  Ah!  My point!  A mere 12 paragraphs into this post and I'm getting to my point!  I do love a meandering story.

As I was mulling and ruminating and processing with many about the fact that they didn't offer me a job, I had a middle of the night revelation.  (Stephanie, funny you posted about this very topic today too)  I hate middle of the night revelations!  Anyway, I revelated that maybe I talk a bit too much about me.  Yes, I see the irony (I love irony!) in my a. having a blog, and b. posting perhaps the longest blog post in history in where I reveal that I think I talk too much about myself.  But, I think I do.  I mean, does anyone else really care that much that I didn't get a lousy job offer that I was going to turn down anyways?  No, and they shouldn't.  They have their own worries, their own blows to their ego, their own crap-in-life they are coping with.  Do I spend enough time listening to others?  Or is it all about me?

So, I am going to try a PDSA.  (I have no idea what those letters mean, but at work, when we want to try something new on a trial-run basis, we do a "PDSA" on it and check in after a few weeks to see how the new way is going.)  I'm going to talk less about myself and listen more.  Make it less about me and more about the other person.

Don't worry, faithful blog reader (s).  I will still come on here to blab and blab about my little life, but in interpersonal conversations, I'll try to zip it and listen more.  And on that note - zip!

yawn...

very tired now.

home from a subversive action.

I LOVE A GOOD SUBVERSIVE ACTION.

briefly, a family friend (Uncle Hi - Mlark) and his partner were disappointed with the board of directors of the   local Audoban Society.

they orchestrated a (hostile) takeover of the board.

I became a member.

I attended their pre-board meeting gathering for a beer and some lively conversation.

I attended the meeting and rable-roused

(yelling out "why not?!" at one point in a particularly contentious moment)

in the end, I and 200 other folks wrote in the newly nominated board members.

we outnumbered the sitting (ducks) crowd by 2 to 1.

there was some confusion as to whether our votes will count, but that's for others to figure out.

I did my part.

now it's to those who are really invested in this to make the changes necessary.

I also threw in a little argument with my father about the current political climate.

we struck a strange but doable deal.

he agreed to watch 25 minutes of Michael Moore's speech 

with.an.open.mind.

I agreed to attend church and "say hi to Jesus".

I'll hold up my bargain, and

I *hope* he will too.

Off to sleep.

More to say, 

but

not

now

home sick

home with sick boy today

the last of my three to fall

this one - upset tummy

he feels rotten and keeps wishing for this day to be over

meanwhile,

I'm trying to be productive on this day-off-from-work.

paid bills.

organized summer-activity catalogues.

sent out invites for three's birthday.

now, I'm off to look for a good quote to add to my protest sign.

I think I'll draw inspiration from the late, great Paul Wellstone.

The sun just made a brief appearance
and now retreated behind the clouds.
It is starting to feel a bit spring-like.
I registered Three for kindergarten yesterday.
Life marches on.

Happy 12 years

This weekend we celebrate 12 years of life for my bro, Mark. 

No, he is older than 12 years old

(going on 40, actually, my baby brother, can't believe it)

This weekend, 12 years ago, Mark was bitten by a snake

a Gabon viper

(deadly motherf&#$er with 2 inch long fangs)

while walking in his flip flop to a friends' house in their village in W Africa

Within a few minutes, the venom starting doing its thing

and Mark was hurt. 

badly hurt.

He emailed me a few days later to say that he *thought* a scorpion bit him

but no big deal

he'll be fine.

I still remember reading that email in my office at work

and thinking, "scorpion??  'I'll be fine'??"

this doesn't sound good 

and it wasn't

but, Mark was healthy and lucky and tall.

Snake only got one fang in and it was on his foot, 

so the venom had a long way to travel to his heart.

Months of recovery

including returning home and getting discharged from the peace corps.

Mark decided not to go out on that note.

So, he headed back to Mali,

back in the peace corps

perhaps, slightly, because of a certain young, sweet thing who was there too.

He finished out his time there, and even extended it.

Came back to the US to continue on his do-gooder-ness here.

And now, today, he's back living overseas.

Again with that certain young, sweet thing whom he has since married

(who has an affinity for sunglasses found on trains, 

and wild children,

but not dogs

or things made of plastic)

So, here's to Mark

and Aisha too.

I think about them every day 

wondering how Palestine is treating them

and how they are treating Palestine.

I can't wait to get over there and see for myself.

what's good.

1. I have a sleeping child on my lap, which is a bit of a feat, since this sleeper is nearly 5 years old and a good sized guy.  
2. I had a productive day at work today.  I was feeling behind and was able to accomplish a lot.  I put on a good radio station thru itunes and jammed away to r+b as I typed, typed, typed.  Writing a novel isn't in me, but I can whip together a compelling psycho-social history in 2-3 pages like nobody else.
3. Bob and One are off on a little Milwaukee date tonight.  Bucks game, hotel in downtown.  They need some time to reconnect.  Things have been a little, uh, stressed between them lately.  I told them both to come back friends.  
4. Friend stopped over tonight and we processed the WI mess but agreed we are hopeful and optimistic.  We even clinked our beers over it.  It's good to be back to optimism.
5. and, now that you mention it - beer.  It's been a while, but I'm enjoying a cold one or 3 tonight.
6. I had a great skype video talk with my bro and sis in law in Ramallah, Palestine today.  Even though I put them to sleep by the end, I really enjoyed it.  I was glad to see their apartment.  Tech-mology is an awesome thing.  Have you skyped?  You should!  It's free!  
7. I got this link on facebook and I laughed until I cried and couldn't breathe.  I don't think I've ever laughed so hard -- certainly not anytime recently.  My soul feels cleansed.  I so needed that emotional release.  

March 3

98 years ago today my sweet and lovely grandfather was born.  He died just under 2 years ago.   Pop's gentle spirit and witty sense of humor have greatly influenced me.  He was a kind man, a gentleman in every sense of the word.  He was progressive -- believing in human (and animal) rights and seeing the world through an ecofriendly viewpoint decades before it was in style.  His favorite activities were riding his bike and sailing (both people powered) and horses and pool (in an homage, I'm sure, to his childhood on the plains of South Dakota where his father owned a livery stable and a pool hall).

Pop wasn't a real rable-rouser but more of a quiet sort.  When I would visit him, he had his list of questions he'd run through -- checking in on our loved ones -- and when that was through, we would often talk current events.  He would often be a voice of calm reason, wondering why we humans didn't treat each other better.  Pop wasn't religious in a praise-God type of way (or really in any sort of way), but he was a profoundly in touch with being kind, doing right, achieving fairness.  He quietly respected my grandmother's (and subsequently my parents') Catholic beliefs.

I still miss him dearly and I always will.  I could use a dose of his gentle sensibilities these days.

And, a bit more recently, 1 year ago, my eldest son dislocated his shoulder on the playground.  He and I were reminiscing about that yesterday -- can't believe it's been a year already.  Much has happened but wow did that year go by quickly.

People united

will never be divided.

Aw, shucks, I just don't have the protester spirit in me today.

I'm feeling defeated.  

Bob told me I was obsessed with the crap at the Capitol.

(Crap at the Capitol - if I were a writing person, I'd pen a musical to that title)

Anyway, he's right.

I even admitted it here.

So, I've taken a step back and reflected on it all.

And I'm deflated.

The budget came out today.

It's bad.

B.A.D.

For the first time in my life, I'm considering moving out of state.

I don't know what that would look like or where we would go, but

slashing $900,000 million

(yes, that's just shy of $1 billion)

from EDUCATION, of all things, 

makes me rethink Wisconsin as the place where I want to raise my kids.

How in the f#$% is it that people think the key to a strong state,

a vibrant, stable, strong economy,

is to cut nearly a billion dollars out of our education budget?

Makes me so mad I want to cry.

In fact, I am.

In other news.....

ah, shit.

what other news is there?