February 2

Hey!  I'm actually sitting at a computer at my house.  Unusual.  I sit at a computer at work, but never, it seems, at home.  I received the best gift in the world for my birthday last fall (an iPad) and that is how I typically surf the web at home.  So handy and convenient, but not so great to type on.  This is my official excuse for never updating this blog anymore.

Anyhow, I am downstairs on the old clunker of a computer that is still chug-chug-chugging along.  I'm supposed to be working on refinancing my mortgage - dudes, rates are dirt cheap right now.  But somehow I wandered over to this dusty corner of the interwebs...

So, how's life with you? 

Things are good by me.  My little unit at work moved from my cozy, lovely workspace to the large, main office a few weeks ago.  I was fretting a bit about the move, and after the move I wasn't too happy, but now that we're settled in, it's ok.  I do miss my old co-workers and the convenience of the old office (i.e. parking), but it's fine.  I walk to work (actually, a hybrid drive/walk in order to get 3 to school on time) and I've really grown to enjoy the walk.  It's approximately a 19 minute walk each way.  Lovely to incorporate some fresh air and light cardio into my day.  I saw a bald eagle on the first walk.  One particulary c-o-o-l-d day (our only one, so far this mild winter) I took the bus, which felt very urban.  I can drive, and did the other day when my stomach wasn't agreeing with me.  I was able to find a rare 8 hour spot on the street so I didn't have to do the move-my-car-every-2-hours dance that my co-workers do every single day.  What a drag.

See what excitement you've been missing out of?  Yes, I haven't been here in a month, and I spend a paragraph talking about parking, of all things.  I'm rusty, and I'm sorry.

In other news, the kids all seem to be doing fine.  One has developed a nice group of friends, and he allows them at our house.  This is a new development.  Since 2nd grade, really, he has refused to have friends come to our house.  Teachers all have said he's social, sometimes a bit too social, but we had no idea who these children he was social with.  Something has shifted* for him this year, and he has had friends over again, including a sleepover party last weekend.  I am so happy to get to know these friends.  They seem to be sweet bunch, though a bit smelly.  I ran downstairs for something during the sleepover and whew.  Smelled like teen spirit.  It smelled like sweat and feet and it was not good.  Beware of the 11 year old boy.

Two is doing great.  He can give us a run for our money, that's for sure (recently typing a list of his favorite things that included "swaring"), but generally, he's easy to please, can go with the flow, happy go lucky.  We went ice skating a couple of times last week when we still had ice, and Two took quite the tumble.  I was busy chatting with another mom and didn't see the fall, but he showed me his red face.  And then the next day I noticed his eyebrow area was all puffed up.  It's transitioned many shades of blue and now green, and it's finally fading.  I took some pictures of it, but they didn't look as horrific as it does in person.

Three is a bit emotional this week.  His instrument is wide open.  He seems to have a shorter tolerance for frustration, which I am chalking up to his sinus/coldn thing that he's battling and lack of sleep.

Oh!  That reminds me what I really wanted to chat about here.  Still with me?

So, One moves onto middle school next year.  Where we live, he has the option to apply to go to a Charter school, which has some distinct advantages (nearby our house, later start time, smaller class size) but is a much smaller school and one which very few, if any, of his friends will attend.  He's been debating this decision, as have I.  Actually, I'm more than debating.  I've been fairly obsessed.  I am talking to people, weighing out (in my mind) the pros and cons, trying to make the perfect decision.  And then it hit me.  I've done this with everything for my poor One since he's been born.  The right kind of blanket to use for him.  Whether footed jammies were better than the ones where his little feet were free.  The right kind of yogurt to eat.  The right preschool to attend.  and on and on.  Big and little decisions were debated, over-analyzed. 

As I was doing the exact same thing with the middle school decision, I thought, "how would I feel if this were Two?  or Three?"  I realized, I would be thinking, "ahh, it will all work out.  They'll be fine at either school.  Advantages and disadvantages to both."  Poor kid, why don't I give One that same freedom, that same luxury of living life without all of the analysis?  No fricking wonder the kid has anxiety.  That realization made me feel both so sad and so relieved.  It will work out. 

So, I've stopped.  My suspicion is that he will end up going to the traditional middle school - the bigger, earlier start one, and that will be fine.  And if he goes to the closer, later start school, that will be fine too.  He will be fine either way.  Just like his brothers. 

Ever since I started working, I've been trying to live that motto.  "It will all work out."  Where Three would attend pre-school last year, who will watch the boys over the summer, how will I get all three boys and myself breakfasted and lunch-bagged and out the door on time every morning by 7:30?  It will all work out, I regularly tell myself under my breath, and it does.  So, I need to remind myself to incorporate that in my parenting.  It will all work out.

I will end on this zen, peaceful note.  I do have a mortgate to work on refinancing, after all.  I don't want to ruin the mood, but I will add a teaser for hopefully a later post.  I went to a 2 hour talk by a couple of police officers on the drug taskforce about the opiate epidemic around here, and it was fascinating.  Fascinating and scary.  I'll share more details later.  If you are a parent, you will want to know.


*Ever get a word that you just start using?  That you incorporate into daily conversation?  "Shift" is mine currently.  I use it often at work or at home, when talking about a situation changing.  I like it!  Feel free to use it yourself!